Adventures of a new mom!

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frustrating March 31, 2010

Filed under: Uncategorized — Danielle Brigance @ 3:41 pm
Tags: , ,

It’s a given that I am battling depression. Duh! Everyone knows!
The one place where I can state my true and honest opinion…get out all my venting, has kinda turned it’s back on me. I love that forum. I love the people there. But, today I was really hurt.
I don’t feel like I’m an ungrateful mother or wife. I know I’m truly blessed to have everything I have. But, who doesn’t want more from their life? You’re lying if you say that you love to clean house, cook dinner, do dishes, do laundry, etc. You’re lying if you say every single second of motherhood is easy and blissful. I don’t think that venting or getting frustrated makes me a bad mom. Especially with depression.
I don’t want to use depression as a crutch. I whole-heartedly want to get better. I know this isn’t the life I’m supposed to live. That being said, I think I’m taking the steps I need to take to get better. I take my medicine, I see a psychiatrist, I’m working on diet and exercise because I know that will eventually make me feel better. I also think it’s harder for me because I’ve been battling it for so long. And it got bad, it got really bad, it got suicide bad. It’s a big hill to climb to get back to normal after that. But I’m trying.
I also wish people would just be up front and say what they think from the beginning. Don’t beat around the bush and act like you like me if you really can’t stand me. If you think I’m a bad mom, say it! Don’t wait for someone else to initiate the conversation and then take that as an opportunity to “gang up” on me. Say it from the freaking beginning! I would much rather someone talk about me to my face than talk about me behind my back!

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2 Responses to “frustrating”

  1. Chelle Says:

    Depression is hard…so, so hard.

    {{hugs}} and I admire you for writing this post, hun.

    xo


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